hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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