But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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