$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
