So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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