This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
