The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
