I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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