i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
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