If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
