glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
This girl is more easily done than said...
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
