Your tits are I can't wait for
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
