May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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