no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
