I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
The air was thick with penises
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
