Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
