I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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