Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
operation harelip BJ is a go
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
