hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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