dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
