Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
