i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
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