Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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