Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Randomize
