New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
