Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
