I think scott just propositioned me for sex
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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