i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
