you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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