go do what you do best...puke behind churches
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize