I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
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