pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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