Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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