so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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