Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
You may now shotgun with the bride
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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