Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize