You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize