the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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