k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
its not stalking. its research.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
