she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
