And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
