We're facebook friends in real life
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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