i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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