Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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