Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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