I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize