How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
My dick has a subreddit
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
