dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
You need Xanax blowdarts
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Randomize
