I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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