Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
