member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
