party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
