Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
