Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
